Author Archives: Grace Zhang

Outdoor painting session

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Finally got to attend an in-person Rose Scholars event! I was really looking forward to this event as I love painting and it was a good way to relax. I had a good time and enjoyed painting and chatting with Maggie and everyone attending. I had several canvases that I bought last semester but never got a chance to paint on them, so I tried to paint some today, but I only got a base coat on those canvases before letting them dry and trying a new painting on a smaller canvas. I tried to paint water for the first time, which was pretty hard and intimidating. I couldn’t capture all the lighter blues clearly since I couldn’t see my reference photo very clearly due to being outside, but I like how it turned out after I touched it up back in my room with a white paint pen.

Heart-wrenching realities in “The Human Element”

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I have to start off by acknowledging that although I do understand and believe that climate change is real and damaging our world, it has never hit terribly close to home, and I’m privileged to live somewhere in the US where the effects of pollution and climate change haven’t affected me or others around me as severely as other places my friends live or the places mentioned in the film.

Watching the documentary informed me of the current effects of climate change on communities, not just those shown on the news like wildfires. It pained me to see people suffering, especially watching the part about Colorado families suffering from asthma, and kids suffering severe asthma that they have to go to the nurses 4-5 times a day. Throughout the documentary, I just kept thinking that it was unbelievable some people still think climate change isn’t real or it’s not a current problem. It’s absurd that some people don’t think that climate change is real or that it’s actually happening, and that it’s some made-up thing. It’s also upsetting to see some people don’t prioritize climate change issues, saying it’s a future problem, it’s not going to affect us now when it clearly not only affects your children/younger generations, but it is also affecting you because it’s happening around us right now. It’s a speedy process that isn’t happening under our eyes right now, so we either ignore it or don’t realize it’s a problem, but if we don’t act, climate change will have a permanent, irreversible for a long time, negative effect on the world, sooner than expected.

“The Queen’s Gambit” Finale: A Bittersweet Ending

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I really enjoyed watching this whole series (although I missed ep 4) and I can definitely see the hype around it when it first came out. I enjoyed watching the character development of all the characters, especially Beth, Jolene, and Harry Beltik.

Last time, I noticed how Beth was way more dependent on substance abuse to get her through life. It finally took a toll on her in episode 6 when she completely passes out in her living room, and it was painful to watch her try to hide it when going to a chess tournament, and for people around her to be concerned for her. I’m so glad when she finally quit and flushed those pills down the toilet and avoided drinking, except when she met Cleo again in Paris, and she nearly missed a match.

I liked how Beth, even as a genius chess player, still wanted to love and still wanted to look “girly” and cared about stylish clothing. In the series, it seemed like others would judge her for caring about her appearance, saying that if she cares about her appearance, she’s not that good of a player. I think that mindset still persists a bit today, especially in male-dominated fields and industries, and I’m glad Beth didn’t play into that stereotype.

I also loved Jolene’s inclusion in the 7th episode, and I love how now she seems to be Beth’s rock, and that she kept following Beth’s chess career even after Beth left Methuen. I also love how with Jolene, Beth seemed to open up more, and she let all her built up emotions out with Jolene there to comfort her, and when Benny and Harry help her at the end, she tears up with happy tears because she has her friends back. I’m glad the series ended the way it did and that Beth now has support.

“The Queen’s Gambit” Ep 5, back from a break

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“The Queen’s Gambit” episode 5 was definitely not like the others. I missed the previous episode, but caught up after reading a synopsis online. I think the turning point of the series was in episode 4 when Alma dies, so I definitely felt a change in the characters and tone of the episode, especially Beth. I noticed so much more emotion, especially subtle emotions hidden behind silence and lack of action whenever Beth interacted with others. For example, when Harry confronts Beth about her personality being like a certain paranoid chess player because he found out about her tranquilizer abuse, Beth seems to go through so many emotions, subtly visible through her face, that are a bit unreadable and makes me wonder what she’s thinking. Also, when Margaret bumps into Beth, Beth says something that makes Magaret almost look offended, but I’m not exactly sure what she’s thinking.

At the end of the discussion, my group talked about how Beth’s emotions are visible on the chessboard and in real life, and we noticed that she gets very invested and emotional when it comes to chess, sometimes letting her anger and other feelings get the best of her, and taking the game too personally when she should be objectively analyzing the game. On the other hand, she’s less in tune with emotions in real life and isn’t really aware of other’s emotions when they’re with her, for example, her relationship with Harry, and him feeling like she doesn’t exactly care for him, but rather just wants to play chess. She also takes on more forms of substance abuse to cope with her problems: Alma’s cigarette addiction, and alcoholism.

Favorite Studio Ghibli Film

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I finally watched Kiki’s Delivery Service for Friday’s Film. I’ve always wanted to watch this movie and it completely exceeded my expectations. At the end of the movie, I was so sad it ended so quickly and I was surprised it just ended right after the climax of the plot. It’s now my favorite Studio Ghibli movie. I loved all the characters, especially seeing Kiki’s growth, independence, and sense of justice and self. I really resonated with her struggle, and since I also love to paint, I understood how it feels to have that artist’s block and to feel like nothing is coming out right. I was inspired by Kiki’s friend who just said even if she has a block, she still just paints, and I think that it’s a good way to grow out of it, because you can’t exactly wait for something to happen or wait to get inspired because you have to make it happen by practicing. You can’t get better at something if you don’t practice it. I think I also need to apply it to my life and stop getting discouraged right when something doesn’t go the way I had hoped.

Beth Harmon Faces Troubles

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In the 4th episode of “The Queen’s Gambit,” we finally see some plot and conflict starting to happen. Beth’s talents in chess got her so far, and she kept on having a winning streak and grew to be a celebrity. She was overconfident and said she didn’t find any flaws in her moves. When she finally faced an obstacle, Benny Watts telling her that Harry Beltik could have won but didn’t, her confidence shattered and she felt devastated. I already thought it was too good to be true, and saw that this was inevitable. Firstly, she never received formal training and obviously didn’t learn everything there is to know about chess just from her time at the orphanage with Mr. Shaibel, and she was only so young and also attributed some of her success to the tranquilizers. Now, rather than seeing herself as undefeatable, Beth seems more human now and has been forced to see she isn’t the best and she still has a lot to learn about chess. It also made the storyline and her success more realistic, since Harry could have won but just made a mistake. Beth wasn’t that talented or undefeatable as she previously thought and previously portrayed.

Also, I liked the cinematography in this episode, especially when Benny Watts approaches Beth at the US open. He was in the frame while he saw Beth and started talking to her, but she wasn’t in the frame and was at table but several paces away. The camera follows Benny as he walks toward Beth, and at first, I was confused, but I think it may have emphasized the fact that Benny walked to Beth and not the other way around, showing that Beth was maybe trying to show she wasn’t afraid of him or was indifferent to his status as the US champion, and that she could beat him. That conversation quickly changed that view, and it was Benny walking away from Beth, leaving her in distress.

“The Queen’s Gambit” picks up the pace

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The second episode of “The Queen’s Gambit” honestly exceeded my expectations. I loved watching every minute of it and felt so invested in the characters and storyline. It was so different from the first episode, and I felt like it was less predictable and exciting.

I loved watching Beth and her relationship with her adoptive parents, which initially seemed tense. Beth didn’t really care for them, and it seemed like her adoptive father the same towards her. But it seemed like everything changed when he left, and Mrs. Wheatley fell into an unstable mental and physical state. I noticed how Beth and Mrs. Wheatley had their first genuine connection when they both agreed they would lie that Mr. Wheatley left them (I still don’t know why he did that and I want to know more, but it felt like a very brief moment in the show that won’t come up again), and it seemed like she was upset but free from the pressures of being a good wife and housewife, and Beth is the distraction she needed. I can’t wait to see how their relationship continues to progress, especially now that Mrs. Wheatley wholeheartedly supports Beth’s interests in chess.

Long Awaited Viewing of “The Queen’s Gambit”

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I finally got to see the famous “Queen’s Gambit” series. I remember back when the fall semester had just started, and so many of my friends were raving about this show and they all recommended it. I hadn’t seen it before, but I read up on the plot of the story months ago, so I knew of some of the plot lines and such, but it was awesome actually being able to see it. I really find it weird how the tranquilizers kind of made Beth hallucinate and essentially become a genius since it’s kind of implied she learned how to play chess after taking the “vitamins,” although I don’t know how much is attributed to just the tranquilizers. I wonder why the writers chose her to have such a drug issue right from the start. I also loved how Jolene kind of already took her under her wing, and seems to be the oldest orphan there, and doesn’t treat the adults there well, but treats the childer like she is their mentor.

I thought the series kind of started off very predictably, but by the end, I was invested. When Beth tries to steal the tranquilizers, the music, pacing, and the camera angles made me think there was going to be a jumpscare any minute, and it ended on such a cliffhanger that might seem cliché, but I definitely can’t wait to watch future episodes.

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African-American Skating Culture in “United Skates”

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I watched “United Skates” for this week’s Friday Film session. It was a very moving and informative experience. First off, I thought the movie was so beautifully done. I went through so many emotions, from smiling to almost tearing up. Second, I’m so glad I watched it and I learned so much about roller skating and its connection to African-American culture. I was really surprised that I honestly didn’t know anything about it or have heard of this part of the culture until watching the film.

It was interesting to learn that roller-skating was so tied to music in the African-American community and that many of the big names that we know now started as roller-skating rink performers. It was beautiful to see people showing off their moves and to see roller-skating becoming an activity where gangs put their differences aside, African-American people came together like a family, and everyone could have a good time and relax from the stress in their lives, but heart-breaking that rinks were one-by-one closing down and people having the one constant happiness in their lives stripped away: I felt so angry and that it was unfair that racism and gentrification mostly caused all of this, even when officials heard their pleas, they still worked against them. I almost shed tears when Buddy Love of Rink City Skate announced that they would be closing during their annual skate party, and watching everyone’s emotions and seeing everyone feel heartbroken once again. I’m glad the movie ended on a good note and that they’re still fighting to keep the adult nights tradition and culture alive. I also noticed they got an Emmy nomination, and so glad and hope that it will trigger more discussion and awareness to preserve the African-American roller-skating culture.