The stress for teens has never been greater, due to the pressure to perform academically and athletically, the impact of the pandemic, and the increased use of screens and social media. Teens are facing more and more negative impacts on their mental health each day.
One key way to help your teen’s mental health and positive development during the many obstacles of adolescence is to talk to them. This may sound like a challenging task because teens, by nature, do not want to talk to you. However, there are a few research-backed tips to keep conversations going and your teen engaged.
- Listen – Resist the urge to be the first one to talk. Research shows we need to pause and take the time needed to truly listen to our teens first. Give them space and practice active listening (preparing to listen, observing not only verbal but non-verbal cues, and offering feedback to acknowledge what is being said).
- Don’t minimize strong feelings – Think back to when you were a teen; angst is real. If you disregard their intense emotions, you run the risk of them feeling misunderstood, making it less likely that they will confide in you in the future.
- Seek to influence, not control – Your teen may feel resentful and stifled if they perceive you as overly controlling. Strive to help guide your children to good decision making, not micromanage every decision they make.
- Counter the urge to teach a lesson – Inquire with your teen first if they want your suggestions before you jump in to help. “Do you want me to give you advice or just listen?” is a good way to approach it. If they do not want your input, make sure you assure them that no matter what, you will always be there. Expressing confidence about their ability to sort things out on their own will build trust and connection.
- Take it slow – Teens have the uncanny ability to sense our desperation. Take your cues from them, know when to back off, let things go, or take a break. As much as it’s tempting to say everything at once, connection is built over time.
Building a bridge between you and your teen may take time, but stay the course. As their parent, you are a critical protective factor for their wellbeing. Building a strong connection through listening to what they have to say will pay off.
All Blogs are written by Professionals in the fields of Nutrition, Human Development and Diabetes.