By Dinah Torres Castro
In the USA, 7.8 million children live in grandfamilies where grandparents or other relatives are the heads of households. For a number of reasons, these grandparents find themselves raising young children once again. Sometimes it is a temporary situation like when a young couple can’t find jobs and they leave their children in the care of their parents as they look for jobs in other cities or states. Another example is when military families are deployed. Sometimes it is for a longer period of time as in the case of incarceration, mental health issues, substance abuse, or the death of their adult child. Whatever the reason, grandparents and other relative caregivers can suddenly be thrust into a complicated world of parenthood in this new millennium. Many of them had envisioned a more relaxed pace in their golden years, and now find themselves in situations where they are waking up 2 am to feed an infant. They may feel helpless in the technology-ridden world of an adolescent. Many grandparents are overwhelmed and unprepared for this new-found responsibility. Adding to their stress are seemingly simple tasks of enrolling a child in school or providing health care which suddenly entangle them in a web of legal issues they may not be able to face alone.
Grandfamilies need help, and very often they are afraid to seek help for fear of losing the children they are caring for. Cornell Cooperative Extension’s Family Health and Wellness Program has been working with grandfamilies through the Parenting the Second Time Around (PASTA) program. For the last couple of years, the Mastics-Moriches-Shirley Community Library and Cornell Cooperative Extension of Suffolk County have co-facilitated a support group for grandparents and other relative caregivers (kinship care providers). The monthly meetings take place at the library from September through June. These meetings allow the group to come together, share their concerns, and explore ways to cope with their unique situations. Special guest speakers occasionally present on a variety of relevant topics to help them make informed decisions and find services for their families. Usually the support group meets on the last Tuesday of the month from 6-7:30 pm. Child care is provided, but you must call to register and make those arrangements with Librarian Pat Mininni at (631) 399-1511 ext. 377.
For more information on grandfamilies, contact the New York State Kinship Navigator:
Dinah Castro is a Bilingual Family Well-Being Educator with Cornell Cooperative Extension of Suffolk County’s Family Health and Wellness Program. She can be reached at 631-727-7850 ext. 351 or at dc258@cornell.edu.