Last Saturday, I attended the Vagina Monologues. I met fellow Rose Scholars and GRF Antonio in the Rose Lobby, and we walked to Bailey Hall together. As we were walking to the show, the conversation was centered on the topics of love, romantic relationships, and significant others. It felt different being back Bailey for a different event this week, after I had gone to the Banff Mountain Festival last week and because I have a class there during the week. The screen was raised and the stage was darker with a blue hue. Slowly, more audience members trickled in. Less surprisingly, the crowd was predominantly women.

While the play held true to its name of “The Vagina Monologues”, there was much more to the performance than this. On the surface, you could say that it was about vaginas, a topic that tends to be taboo, but beneath the theme of vaginas was another very important, often forgotten topic, which is that of love and respect for oneself and for others. To a large degree, I think this is where the discomfort comes in talking about our different body parts. There were times when I did feel a bit uncomfortable, but simultaneously wondered why more people are not discussing these things. The actors and the stories portrayed made it clear that we have to have confidence and encourage others to do the same. Rather than put ourselves and other people down, we have to raise them up. From the play, you get glimpse at how so much good can come from having the courage to speak up, speak out, and address some of these discomforts head on.

One of my close friends was in the play. She had the role of a character who was sexually abused as a young child. Her performance was riveting. The monologue that she performed in along with others about the abuse that transgender women and men and women of genitalia mutilation face were extremely powerful. They remind us that our society as a whole still has a long way to go before we achieve total acceptance of men, women, and simply treating all people as equals and independent people who can make their own decisions about their bodies and lives.

As we were walking back to West Campus, the conversation was centered more on the play itself. I would agree with fellow Rose Scholars who attended and GRF Antonio that the play really has something for everyone. There are moments when you will burst out laughing, others when you may end up in crying, and some when you may be smiling on the outside and shedding tears on the inside. At some point, everyone should see the play. While I can understand where some of the common controversies within the play can come from, I can also appreciate the brute honesty of the monologues. This is something that I greatly applaud Eve Ensler for, in addition to her efforts to end violence against women through initiative like V-Day. If my vagina could talk and wear anything, it would say, “I am courageous and proud to be me” and would wear a button to match.

Vagina Monologues. The name struck me as soon as I heard it. What could it possibly mean? A group of women giving a 2-hour presentation on vaginas and telling other women’s stories relating to their vaginas. Absolutely yes and much more. The first act “hair” set a good precedent to what the show was going to be like. The dialogue between two women discussing men’s obsession with women’s pubic hair brought out many issues relating to women succumbing to men’s idea of sexual pleasure.  Shaving pubic hair is a very emotional and terrifying experience for women because it physically removes a layer that is needed to protect their vaginas. Ultimately it should be up to the woman, not the man, to decide if she wants to remove her vaginal hair because she is in control of her own body and has the responsibility to take care of it.

The skits in which the girls embraced their sexuality was as liberating for us to watch as it was for them to perform. The skit about the two sex workers talking about their sexual encounters with women while dancing on the pole was very exciting to watch. By acting out their emotions through their pole dance, the girls created a humorous environment for girls to indulge in their sexual pleasures. And what better way to describe your sexual desires than to physically act them out in front of a live audience. Everyone was in splits by the end, and I wanted to give those two girls a standing ovation. The vagina monologues recognized women who have faced and experienced sexual violence in their lifetime, but also exposed the hypocrisy, scrutiny, and humor that goes along with looking at one’s vagina. I’m looking forward to seeing their show next year.

Last weekend under an eerie night sky, the rose residents went up to Bailey Hall to watch The Vagina Monologues. It was my first time attending the show but I had been interested in going because a friend recommended to go see it. At first, I was not sure what to expect from this show. I was expecting it to be informative and perhaps formal since the topics that were discussed were serious issues. On the contrary, the cast delivered their lines in a way that was often humorous and informative. There were shorts that were intense and powerful, while there were also countless funny references that kept the audience captivated.

The topics relating to vagina is rarely raised in public because people find it either awkward or offensive to discuss openly. This show was an eye opening experience where I saw and heard the casts freely talk about a variety of issues that females and/or minority groups face every day. My favorite part of the show was when the cast retold real stories of women, because it raised public consciousness while also keeping the identity of the women safe.

Overall, this was an excellent show that I would recommend to any of my friends. I will be back next year with my friends for more laughter! A big thank you to the staff and cast for making this possible!

Night sky while walking to Bailey Hall

The cast and staff

The Vagina Monologues was a powerful and insightful event that showed me how oppressed women still are to this day and how much stigma there is to women trying to be open about their sexuality and desires. There’s a double standard in our society between men and women, as women are often slut-shamed for being open about their desires. In addition, the event urged people to be more comfortable with saying the word vagina, and taught women (and men) to not feel shamed about talking about.

Overall, it was a funny, informative, powerful, and uplifting event that was well worth attending and I recommend everyone check out the event at least once.  Continue reading →

I have sex…let that settle. I have sex and I love it. However, indulging in my vagina’s needs (especially through the current hook up culture scene) means often defending my morals and values. I don’t respect myself any less if I have sex. Why is that such a difficult concept?

Millions of women can scream I love sex, and white, middle-class, male psychologists will come up with a million reasons why our childhood was broken and how we are fundamentally, mentally wrong….ummm no, I am 100% capable of higher order thinking and (quite frankly) understanding where my actions are coming from. My need for sex comes from human basic need. Accept it.

One of the most offensive things a guy I hooked up with asked me was “Where’s your self esteem?”…ummm apparently where yours is as well. My self-esteem doesn’t revolve around what my vagina is subjected to. My self-esteem revolves around just that – the self, me. And if you associate my self-esteem to my vagina, through logic of deductive reasoning, congratulations you just reduced me to a fleshy hole.

You know what?! You can suck my dick  vagina.

Slut, just not your slut.

Everytime.

Check your hands, not my morals.

https://www.instagram.com/latinarebels/

I never actually take the time to focus on my vagina, just like the story of the old woman who had to “discover” her vagina after years of unfamiliarity. It is just something that I know is there, and I was timid about talking about the in and outs of the region. The Vagina Monologues provided the type of female empowerment that seems to be missing or that is in the forefront with demolishing double standards. For example, right now, Amber Rose is a noteworthy individual who is for the cause of female sexual empowerment. Just like Amber Rose’s efforts, the event made it a safe space to explore female sexuality and for women to be comfortable in their sexuality.

The show showed the female sexuality goes beyond pleasing a partner, and should and also be about getting pleasure oneself. And we should feel comfortable in our bodies, all parts including those that we are taught to hide and keep a secret. What I got from the show is that if we as women need to learn to undue the damage that society has had us believe about our sexual experiences with the opposite and the same sex. I think it is very important to address these issues because they go hand in hand with self-esteem, confidence, and self-image.

Lastly, I wanted to highlight some of my favorite performances. I really appreciated the scene with the different types of moans. The actresses made comments about how they felt the need to deter the moaning, particularly with the opposite sex. So to get the audience comfortable with the act of moaning and get us to believe that moaning, is in fact a normal effect that comes with great pleasure. It should not be fake, and should just be a sound that comes out comfortably.

How had they done it? So openly. So boldly. So comfortably. They talked about those two words – the two words that had only been spoken in dire situation: VAGINA and SEX.

I watched scene after scene, women around my age, take back a power I rarely understood to exists. The power to break down the societal pressures and norms around what the vagina should and should not do. The power to determine that the vagina is meant for pleasure and understanding that pleasure should not be taboo. The power to attach this wonderfully crafted, God-masterpiece to liberation???

Liberation??

Liberation?

Liberation.

Liberation…

Liberation!

Li-Ber-A-Tion !!!!

The progression of the vagina being a great source of liberation clicked in my mind by the end of the Vagina Monologues, because I had come to learn that it was not a deep-dark secret that only my friends and I discussed in the privacy of our homes. The vagina was universal in those moments. The vagina was experienced in those moments. The vagina had stories and tips that I had longed to know, but never asked. Then I got to thinking…

My mother: a single-woman who has five daughters has spoken to us about our “coochies” as something to not be touched, and to be for marriage. What about the rest of it? What if we didn’t want to wait until marriage?

The women: Many of the women in my neighborhood treat vaginas and sex like taboo. Like the worst devil imagined. No one addresses it with youth until someone turns up pregnant as a teenager. Why isn’t anyone talking about how good sex is for the body, heart, and mind? Maybe because of religion. But then again that would be dumb because religion places great emphasis on sex. Now, of course it doesn’t place emphasis on pleasure. That’s the problem! I’m convinced that many grown women I know are in great need of sex, because no one taught them about pleasure and how amazing it is to discover their bodies, as well as allowing others.

Thinking of the Vagina Monologues, the different kinds of women who participated, my mother, the other women in my life, my sisters, my ideas of the vagina & sex, I knew that I was empowered. Now I may not run through the Earth screaming free vaginas of the patriarchy, religion, and societal norms, but I will work effortlessly to teach my sisters and my children – if I ever have them – that the vagina is one of God’s greatest creations, and we ought to embrace it!

I feel very lucky to be one of the nine students that got a ticket to The Vagina Monologue show tonight. The show was consisted of several monologues, each represented by a case that happened to an individual or a group of women in real life. Each monologue told a story about the experience of a woman with relationship and sex. More importantly, the sincerity and thoroughness of each character deeply relates to the audience present and promoted women to be more confident and care about their body unapologetically. I laughed very hard in one monologue which a sex worker told her experience working with female customers and dissed her previous job as a lawyer. It set a very positive and funny tone while sending the message that woman should not be ashamed of themselves for their vagina and the pleasure.

This show gave me a lot positive strength and made me reflect on my personal bias as a woman. Sometimes when I read the posts other people wrote, I noticed that a girl tended to use softer and more passive expressions that guys, and that perhaps applies to my writing as well. I once talked to a seasoned professional in Johnson school, she told me that right now only 10% professionals in investment management industry are women.  I am not entirely sure where that under representation comes from, but I certainly felt intimidated by guys in public settings (networking sessions, club meetings…) at times. After watching the show, I am more certain that I should be most honest and brave with myself.

Again, I think The Vagina Monologue is a great show with very dedicated and talented people. Also the cast is consisted of a incredibly diverse set of women from freshman to PhD and from chemical engineering to AEM major. I learned something tonight from these energetic women. Thank you for organizing this event!