The biggest takeaway from the “How Do We Love” session was that even though we all came from different backgrounds and situations, we all generally agreed about the ideas of love.  I’ve always felt that the definition of love was something that can’t be defined or set by certain parameters. There’s no age limit, or limits to race or gender.  Love is something for everyone and everything and there’s no way to define who it doesn’t belong to because it belongs to everyone.  There are so many forms of love like the relationship between a mother and her child, or two people romantically involved, or even two best friends.

The definition in our session I most agreed with was the idea that love is not just a feeling but also an action.  When we think about love as an action, and not just a simple feeling, we can now gain control over love.  Some people can justify a bad relationship by just saying “Oh I can’t do anything about the way I feel”, but if you believe love is also an action you can choose to take control.  Some people may disagree, but I’ve always believed that there is some action to love.  I’m not denying that emotions and feelings are a part of it; I’m just saying that people can be held accountable for love through their actions.  The best metaphor I can imagine is that love is like a flower.  It can sprout through a connection or feeling, but it grows by watering and nurturing it.  In the same way, the flower will die if it not given the nutrients it needs.  You can say you love someone all you want, but unless your actions prove it, the flower will wilt and die.

What I learned through this process was that I’ve been neglecting some of the relationships in my life, particularly the relationships with my parents, grandparents and my siblings.  I spend a lot of time on my relationship with boyfriend that sometimes I forget about my family.  I just have to remember to water all the flowers in my life and not put one above the others.