As I walked over into the math and science room on my last day of volunteering, I sat down with some of the students who were playing connect four. As we started playing they all told me that I was playing it wrong and had lost. I was so surprised as I knew no other way to play connect four. They showed me all of the versions of the game they had come up with and exactly how to play. Given that connect four is a classic game, I was beyond surprised to see all of the variations and rules they had created. I was so glad to see them having a good time and creating the rules as they went on and laughing at the things they were not sure about.

Sometimes it is so easy to assume and think that certain things can only be done a certain way; however, so many of the rules and norms we blindly follow are far from concrete and are not permanent in any sense. Often when we find the courage to act beyond these rules we end up not only being our truest selves but also the happiest. We are told so often to think outside of the box or to be creative to stand out amongst our peers; however, we often try to accomplish this within the constraint of everyday rules and norms we simply are not taught to think beyond. Watching the children play and laugh as they redefined their own rules was nothing short of admirable and caused me to reflect on so many of the things I do simply because I have been taught to.

As the kids navigated their way from their first choice room to their second choice room I stayed back to help some of the kids clean up. As we were cleaning up and the new group of kids entered the room, a group of students were not willing to share their toys with other students. One of the students who has a physical disability was unable to get up and run around and physically demand the toys she wanted like many of the other kids and she resigned herself to a corner of the room. She sat there by herself and looked upset when the other students started bringing over the toys to her and they all played in the space around her. 

This was really touching to see as we often assume that working with kids is a difficult task and sometimes it is difficult to get through to them; however, many of our innate values are the same, and it doesn’t take a grown adult to realize that. It was moving to see that without any external directions the kids themselves acted in a way that prioritized inclusion and despite the differences that may exist between children, and people in general, oftentimes if we act upon our instincts in the right way the things that may seem like differences are actually agents of inclusion that bring us together. 

Although I was fairly familiar with the practices at BJM after a few weeks of volunteering I still had no idea what to do when two students get into a conflict. I was in the art room listening to a third-grader Sam talk about the space station he built using legos when two other students started arguing and exchanged some mean words. I was unsure of what I should be doing and that is when Ms. Sarah stepped in. She not only reprimanded the students for the mean nature of the words they were exchanging but she asked them both to apologize. She did not only say that the kids needed to apologize and then simply walk away, but she also stayed there until they apologized to each other, making sure that they looked at each other while doing it, and ensured that they meant it. I was in awe of her dedication to making sure her students not only learned academically but also instilled in them values that will serve them well beyond school. 

This made me reflect on the interactions I participate in every day and made me question how many of the words that I exchange I actually mean between mindless text messages or quick conversations I, like many people, engage in as we rush from one place to another. Revisiting the power that words hold and how imperative it is to actually mean the words we say may sound like an idea that is elementary; however, it is fundamental in redefining the interactions we engage in every single day. 

As I got to BJM Ms. Stacy told me that I can either head over to the math and science room or the art room, and I decided to head over to the art room. I sat down with a couple of students and recognized a student I had spent time with last week. I asked Maddie what she was trying to do and she told me that she is writing a card and needs me to help her spell some names, including her own. As we started, she closely imitated the motions I was making with the marker until we got to a lowercase ‘q.’ We struggled with this for a while and I kept redrawing it in the hopes that she will eventually understand, and ultimately Maddie let out a loud sigh and said “Seher, you aren’t doing it properly! You need to make a small head and draw a ponytail on it.” As soon as she said that Ms. Sarah and I started laughing and I could not do much else other than agree. 

This simple incident for some reason has stuck with me and it made me realize how important perspective is, sometimes the things we tend to overthink and complicate as adults can seem less daunting only if we looked at them a little differently. Being able to help Maddie write her name was something I greatly enjoyed as she seemed so excited and motivated to learn and it is something that made my time there infinitely more valuable and enjoyable.

After a long day of classes, my mind was still clouded with the thought of all of the upcoming assignments and exams I needed to prepare for as I walked over to Beverly J. Martin Elementary School. I was almost in a daze as I signed in and searched for Ms. Stacy when suddenly I felt someone tapping on my hand,  I turned around and was greeted by a second-grade student and she said, “Hi can I give you a hug?” Before I could answer, I felt her small arms around me and my entire heart felt warm. I found Ms. Stacy moments after and she explained to me the normal protocol I’d be following every week from thereon. As it was my first day, I was allowed to explore and wander between the Math and Science room and the art room- I decided to head over to the art room. 

In the art room, I met Ms. Sarah who was not only an incredibly kind person but an extremely wonderful teacher as all of the kids seemed to listen to her. Her dedication to her students was apparent in the way she looked after them, and the respect her students gave her was no different. She shared with me how interacting with her students was a big part of her life, as she came from a big family back home and this was the kind of interaction she cherished. I was not only in awe of her incredible story and spirit but learned a lot from her on my very first day there. The way she got through to so many of her students was not only by being kind but by respecting and caring for everyone around her in a manner that made everyone feel as if though their presence mattered, and the way in which they communicated even more so.