This week I attended the Rose showing of the Super Bowl. It was quite an educational experience – I learned a great deal about sports gambling, for instance, and about certain cultural lore concerning how young the coach for the Rams was.

What struck me about the game, however, was how utterly American it was. The presence of the military was very prominent, from fighter jets overhead to the branches of the military being present on the field. The singing of our national anthem in addition to other national songs, as well as the presence of American flags, signals the presence of the state as purveyor of the great game.

This leads me to the conclusion that the Super-Bowl is America’s first step towards total fascism. Here we see the origin of what one day will be grand, triumphant military parades. It starts in our sports stadiums and ends on the national mall, I say! We shall sing our anthems, praise our state, and march on towards rightful military conquest before long. If we do not bulwark ourselves against such displays as the Superbowl America as we know it may be lost!

(In case it wasn’t clear my tongue is planted firmly in my cheek for the above – I don’t literally believe any of this, but the presence of so much military imagery at the event did give me moment for pause. I hope this was as humorous for you to read as it was for me to conjure up).