At GRF Sara’s Rose Cafe, we discussed her research in Romance literature, and how our understanding of Romance (and romance, lowercase) has shifted not only throughout history but also throughout our own lives.

Somewhat surprisingly, a lot of what we consider to be fantasy nowadays would actually have fallen under the category of Romance in the past (and maybe still falls under that category today, depending on your view). Maybe even more surprisingly, nearly everyone in the room felt like they were more drawn to fantasy/Romance when they were younger than they are now, and feel nostalgic about about it, if anything. Sara noted that even in history, Romance was a genre that sought to blend magic and reality, offering a wildly unique take on the world and a transformative experience for the reader – qualities which in my opinion appeal to the youthful sense of wonder in all of us.

Maybe that’s why we “romanticize” things nowadays, or call certain actions or words “romantic” – these terms have deviated from the traditional definition of Romance and likely derive from the modern lovers’ romance with which we’re more familiar, but we often use them to describe things that are unrealistic. When someone tells me a story about what their significant other did for them on their birthday, for instance, I’ll think, how romantic, but what that really means is how ideal. Along those lines, people who romanticize something are idealizing it, or viewing it as a model to be emulated or achieved. In a way, Romance and romance are two versions of the same human desire to experience the unreal, or the ideal. For me, that was the main takeaway from this talk: that Romance and romance aren’t as different as we originally tend to perceive.