Last Saturday, we had a discussion on the definition of love. It started out with analyzing and commenting on pictures that showed many different types of love: familial, platonic, religious, romantic, and compassionate. We then started formulating ideas for why these things are classified under the umbrella term of love. All of them brought happiness for an extended period of time if that love was classified as conditional. However, familial love, we all agreed tended to be more unconditional; people are more forgiving of familial ties because we do not choose our family.

The more abstract part of the debate was how each of us defined love. We all agreed that love is more so an action than just a state of mind. However, after hearing everyone’s opinions on love and things concerning love, I stopped assuming everyone had the same opinions as me on what exactly love is. For example, we discussed domestic violence and crimes of passion that have been justified in the name of love. In my opinion, I did not classify these types of behavior as love because I do not believe love is selfish and controlling. But someone brought up a great point that we may not, physically abuse the people we love, but we sometimes get in fights with our loved ones and say things we do not mean. Yet these instances, a fight between a mother and daughter, “do not” change our perception of love and the nature of the relationship. We have normalized these instances because they do not involve physical harm, yet the behavior still would not be classified as “love”.

I feel we are in a constant struggle to show and receive love. And at times it can be hard to define, depending on the person and the particular relationship.