“Grief only exists where love lived first.” – Franchesca Cox
Loss is an inevitable part of life and it comes with many layers especially if it is impacting the entire family. Grief and loss can stem from a death of someone, a terminal illness, an unwanted move, divorce or break up, loss of a pet, or even a significant disappointment. It can be a challenging, confusing and a complex journey.
The following are some ways to navigate this time, with care, for yourself and your family members.
Emotional Support – Encourage open and honest communication with all family members, creating a space that allows everyone to feel heard and understood. Validating each person’s emotions and reassuring them that all sorts of feelings are normal. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable by sharing your own feelings, teaches children healthy emotional expression.
Age Appropriate Explanations – Depending upon your child’s developmental stage, they each have different understandings of death and loss. Tailor your explanations to their age and cognitive level while providing reassurance. Using appropriate children’s books sometimes helps them understand a situation better and allows for conversations to occur more easily.
Creating Rituals and Preserving Memories – Engage in activities that honor the deceased or acknowledge the loss. Share stories, create memory books, or plant a tree in their memory. These provide a sense of connection and closure to help facilitate the grieving process.
Maintain Structure and Routine – Attempt to provide a sense of normalcy during turbulent times. Consistency helps provide the stability and comfort when emotions are unstable.
Individual Grief – Accept that each person will handle grief differently. Respect their unique coping mechanisms and be patient with their journey.
Self-Care – Helping each family identify ways they can practice self-care during this time. It can be journaling, exercise, seeing friends, listening to music, drawing, looking at pictures, etc. Taking time to take care of ourselves as we gently move into a new space is extremely important.
Transitioning – After a significant loss, some caregivers might feel that they now lack a purpose. Patience and understanding helps them to regain a new normal in their own time.
Seeking Professional Help – Reaching out to others is a sign of strength and sometimes is needed to move forward after a loss. Finding the right practitioner can help youth and adults move through the grieving process.
There is no one way to grieve. Be patient with yourself and with your loved ones.
Your family matters,
Suzan
