“The motorcade . . . is an impressive sight: a long line of dark cars, flashing lights, sirens and enough weapons to start, or stop, a small war.” -Mary Cheney
Elle Woods suggests the bend and snap. Tom Cruise recommends jumping on couches. Dennis Rodman stays safe – he sticks with the dependable hair dye.
But no worry, my friends, I have created the perfect recipe for stopping traffic. I guarantee it works every time. You don’t have to be young, good looking or even have a straight shot!
Ingredients: Lots of big, black, bad looking SUVs and many friends who have large guns.
Makes: All pedestrians, cars, trains, planes and busses within a 5 mile radius stop moving due to loud sirens and the size of your impressively blinged posse. Everyone else in the world is now late, but you’ll always be on time!
Sounds pretty good, right? Now you’ll just need a few hundred of your best friends and some really loud whistles and bells to make it work.
Or, just become my neighbor who lives a bit down Mass. Ave. Hey, did you see the front of the Post, Dick? How are Lynne and the girls doing? Been back to Wyoming recently?
Oh, and nice wheels Mr. V.P. Where can I get (15) sets like that?